Days come and days go. Time never stops passing,
But memories remain. Some are good or all right,
At least, but others aren't, leaving sadness amassing.
My parents, so unworthy of the name, raised me in
A miserable, never-ending round of hell, and I just
Couldn't escape. What I went through I can't begin
To describe. Fear, misery, loneliness, and frequent pain,
Along with a steady, eternal erosion of my self-esteem.
Oh, I remained alive but I also learned something main
To my survival: completely concealing my feelings so
They couldn't be used against me. I learned young to
Lock everything inside and hide my true self away. No
One knew me. I trusted in little ways now and again,
But still held back. I didn't reveal myself, the real me,
At least not fully. Then I met you, one of several men
At work, entrenched in a chilly, emotional distance.
I was outwardly calm, smiling and joking, while my
Reality swirled inside me — a well-concealed existence.
You never chuckled or smiled but joked a little with me,
Voice deep, raspy. You were awkward, unused to levity,
But over time, you burst into a laughter so real and free,
Shocking everyone. They'd never seen a smile from you.
You shared tidbits of your past, which was so akin to mine.
My walls, strong, impenetrable, and more than just a few,
Shook and weakened somewhat, no longer as strong or fine.
They didn't fully disintegrate or crumble, but began to shrink
A little and continue to. Desolation had dwelt in me, all mine.
Enduring pain had lived in my bones and soul and they grew.
I didn't know they existed and I'm sure they would've stayed
In place forever. But something changed for me. I met you.

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