Mr. Loki: babyfather
By: Kate Meyer-Currey
Shapeshifters have more fun.
Take it from Mr Loki, he knows.
He's biggest swinger in the Nine
Worlds. And both ways, too. He's
Had his fun but he's paying for
It now. No word of a lie. Allfather
Odin makes sure he don't miss
Those maintenance payouts.
Only has one eye but he sees
Everything. And let's face it,
Mr Loki is a hard act to follow
but his kids are scene-stealers.
He's done the monogamy thing.
Settled down with a Valhalla of
The Dolls bored Goddess (sorry
She asked for it by setting that
Spying little squirrel Ratatosk
On his tail like a Private Dick
When he was legitimately about
Private affairs). It may all be
Pilates and reiki on Rainbow
Drive right now but Ragnarok
Is coming and she won't last
Through Fimbulwinter in those
Yoga pants. She'd be better off
Signing up for self-defense
Classes; she's a Valkyrie when
Roused; I've dodged a few mead
Horns in my time. Like when she
Found out about my FWB thing
with Angurboda in Jotenheim.
Giantess? I prefer to call her a
BBW with an insatiable appetite.
For me. And our progeny define
Mixed races, that's for sure. Hel's
An average girl apart from the
Fact she's dead down one side
Of her body. Still, she's found a
Niche for herself doing social
Work in the underworld. She
Kind of queens it down there
And she'll laugh with the other
Side of her face when I rock up.
Jormungund is a real snake. I
Mean literally a giant serpent.
It was a shock when he slithered
Out, ready to strike. I'm not one
For animal cruelty, but it was
Better to throw him in the sea
Than flush him down the toilet.
He's been round the world and
Back on a voyage of underwater
Exploration. Could be he was just
Chasing his tail, but now he's come
Full circle he's bitten off more than
He can chew. If he unbuckles now,
The World will fall apart. I have a
Soft spot for Fenrir, my wolf-boy.
He gets his teeth into a project and
Sees it through to the end. He has
Always been a bit of a wild one;
Hard to tie down. Right now he's
In the doghouse, but he'll see the
Whole of the moon (and swallow
It too) when the world ends. Bite
Back at you, Granddaddy Odin! I
Mustn't forget Sleipnir, my eight-
Legged stallion (takes after me
There). He's the product of some
Horseplay that got out of hand
When I morphed into a mare to
See if girls have more fun. I did.
He was the cutest little foal you
Ever saw and now my little pony
Is Odin's runaround. I guess it's
Reassuring to know that one of
My brood is accepted, especially
After I shook the family tree and
Such a bunch of nuts fell out…
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